We would never pass judgment on how or where you eat your favorite foods – food time is all about you doing you. But apparently, in some parts of the country, the government still wants to have a say in how you snack. Damn the man!
1. Greene, New York: It is against the law to eat peanuts and walk backwards on sidewalks while a concert is playing.
This is oddly specific, which makes it fun to try and imagine the exact event that made it necessary to create this law. We hope it involved elephants playing tubas.
2. Beech Grove, Indiana: Eating watermelon in a public park is forbidden.
Parks are, arguably, some of the best places to eat watermelon. So what’s the reason? Apparently watermelon rinds were breaking open garbage bags and causing terrible messes. Keep it clean, Beach Grove-ians.
3. Massachusetts: At a wake, mourners may eat no more than three sandwiches.
Ain’t nothing sadder than a limit on sandwiches. Especially when you’re already sad. In the words of Liz Lemon, “…all anyone really wants in this life is to sit in peace and eat a sandwich.” Or four.
4. Maryland: It is against the law to eat while swimming in the ocean.
This is either because sharks love hamburgers, or the people of Maryland just want Wendy Peffercorn to jump into the water and cite them for snacking.
5. Gainesville, Georgia: It is illegal to eat fried chicken with anything other than your hands.
Apparently in Georgia, fingers are the new forks. Even more strange? They actually enforce it. Even on 91 year old women celebrating their birthday.
6. California: It is illegal to eat an orange in your bathtub.
Rinds may float, but they are apparently unacceptable bath toys. And to be fair to the sunshine state, this does seem like an unsanitary activity. Don’t eat and bathe.
7. Carmel, New York: It’s against the law to eat ice cream while standing on the sidewalk.
There are no rules when it comes to ice cream eating, Carmel. I mean come on…just look at your name! You gotta respect the treat and let it do what it wants.
8. Rosemead, California: It is illegal to eat ice cream in public with a fork.
Um…excuse me, Rosemead. See above. WE EAT ICE CREAM HOWEVER WE WANT.
9. Connecticut: It is illegal to call a pickle a pickle if it doesn’t bounce.
The only food that should bounce is Jell-O. But not according to Connecticut. If a pickle can’t bounce, it’s just a sad cucumber.